The concept of doing something before, and getting something in return after, is one of the fundamental pillars our society was build upon. I work, I learn, and I listen, where after I will get something in return. As things go, we believe that when things are not constructed this way, people would just do whatever they want. Therefore, the concept of deserving something is deeply wired within our behavior. It often dictates expectations, emotions and decisions.
What Is Deserving?
Therefore, it looks like that something needs to happen before I can get ahead in life. Regardless if it is the work I do, if I treat someone kindly or if I was unfortunately born in to a poor family. Supposedly only then, I have the right on something in return. The case is however, I do not have the right to anything, nor do I deserve anything. The fiction that is the idea of deserving, is a mere creation of us humans. There is no lion in the world that thinks, after following a gazelle for ten kilometers, I deserve to eat it now. Expecting hereafter, that nature will provide the animal ready to be eaten.
To believe this fiction for reality, is like playing roulette with my freedom of choice and emotions. Firstly, I only have the right on a reward, after I do something. Therefore, I start basing what I do on what I will get in return. Secondly, because I have unconsciously connected emotions with this process. Since it is up to someone else to give me what I deserve, I ultimately give away control over my emotions. Not until I realize however, that this concept is a mental creation, nothing more than a Fata Morgana, I can deal with it’s consequences appropriately. Do I agree with that I need to work for what I deserve? Do I want to let my feelings depend on the kind of reward I am getting for what I did?
The Deserve Delusion
I believe the delusion provoked by an idea so common within our society is stunning. It is a significant part of many bad feelings, friction within relationships, and often at the core of dysfunctional behavior. Nature, and our body as a part of it, do not function according to the idea of deserving something. The trees do not drop their leaves because they think they deserve new ones, our stomach does not think after two plates of salad it deserves a hamburger, nor does my body stop healing a cut in my arm just because it thinks it should have a break after three days.
Every single person is subject to the laws of nature, it is up to us though, how we handle them. Do I want to confuse me and my emotions by subscribing to an idea that is nothing more than the creation of a human brain, or do I realize that I can take and get whatever I want from what the universe has to offer. I do not need to wait for anybody to give me a reward, least of all myself. Engaging in what I like, what I perceive as important and what ultimately makes me happy is not something I deserve. It is mine already.